Off Morning

Woke up today with a pounding in my head. My teeth were clenched. Must've had a rough night. Yet I slept through most of it.

Our landlord's realtor is showing our place this morning. Earl cleaned the kitchen, table, and living room last night. I've been folding laundry. I'm not excited that people want to see the place.

#1-It's just a pain in the butt

#2-If the place gets sold, it's not likely the new owners want renters and would be tearing down the place.

#3-If AZ doesn't work out, we would need to find a new place to live. (No I didn't call them, I'm giving them until the 15th. Then I will call.)

#4-As much as I enjoy a clean home, I hate having to clean it for complete strangers. Such a hassle for someone who will only be here for about 5-10 minutes.

And that's my morning. They will be here in just under 2 hours.

Better go fold some more laundry.

From Where I'm Sitting

I have discovered that I do most of my "thinking" while at work. This is probably because I have time to sit and do nothing. Well, not nothing exactly, but there is down-time. And I always liked to write, so why not fill my down-time with blogging? Because we all know that by the time I get home from work I am tired, hungry, and just want to lay in bed.

It is now the 10th of January. I haven't heard back from AZ about the job. I was told not to expect to hear anything until after the first of the year. Well, I'm still waiting! So I will give them a call tomorrow. If I can muster the courage to call.

I really am hoping that this job works out. I'm not thrilled about leaving family and friends, but I feel that this is a good opportunity to move forward with life. I would be making less than I make now, but not by much. Also, apartments are way cheaper out there.

I'm not sure though if my positive thinking is just me being hopeful or someone else saying that yes, this is where I'm to go.

Sometimes I'm a little dense when it comes to answers. Can't help it. I'm blonde.

From where I'm sitting the future is pretty foggy. Like pea soup foggy. I'm hoping that soon I will work my way to the edge of that fog and I will be able to see clearly. Like a few weeks ago when I was driving down the freeway on my way to work and visibility was at about 100ft. I could see a hazy light underneath and then all of a sudden the fog lifted and I could see the sunrise. It wasn't the most beautiful sunrise, but to break free of the fog was glorious. To suddenly be washed in early light was refreshing. So just like I was driving through the fog, I have to move forward in life. I can't wait for the sun to burn off the fog. I'll be waiting hours if I did.

Wow, that was a little too thoughtful for a Tuesday. Sorry, please forgive me!

In other news, I don't have any. Have a wonderful day!

Resolutions? Naw...

Do you like to make New Year's Resolutions? You do? I'm sorry, we can no longer be friends.

Just kidding.

Kind of.

I think I used to like to make them. The whole self-improvement thing, you know? I always say that I want to get in shape. That seems to be popular with the mass population. And 24 Hour Fitness.

Last year, I think, I said I was going to write something every day. That wasn't so much of a resolution though, because it wasn't in January when I said it. So for me to say that I want to blog more often, I suppose it is a resolution of sorts. And if I keep it vague, by say, not attaching a number to it, I'm okay. Right? Like I won't say that I will write a post every day. Or every other day. Or even once a week. Well, once a week might be doable. But I'm not going to commit to it.

Does that mean I have commitment issues?

I have a hard time posting often because I don't feel that I have anything worthwhile to share. I very rarely have pictures to post because I don't do anything! I'm kind of a homebody. I go to work, I go home. I shower and get in bed and watch an episode or two of "Burn Notice" on NetFlix. Earl and I don't go out and do stuff. We try to have a date night once a week. Usually that consists of dinner. Maybe a movie. And we don't have kids. So I don't have fun/crazy/silly/destructive stories to tell.

I have a cat.

I refuse to be the crazy cat lady. So I don't post pictures of her in cute little outfits.

Mainly because she would claw me to death if I tried to put on on her.

But she is cute. She is 9 months old now. She still curls up super tiny and cute.

I'm not the crazy cat lady.

So maybe I can do a post a week. Maybe. I might be able to scrounge up enough to jabber about for a post. If not, just remember that I didn't commit to a specific number of posts so if I don't post, I cannot be held accountable. Okay?

Okay!

The Gift of Song

Where can I turn for peace?
Where is my solace
When other sources cease to make me whole?
When with a wounded heart, anger, or malice,
I draw myself apart, searching my soul?

Where when my aching grows,
Where, when I languish,
Where, in my need to know,
Where can I run?
Where is the quiet hand to calm my anguish?
Who, who can understand?
He, only one.

He answers privately,
Reaches my reaching
In my Gethsemane, Savior and Friend.
Gentle the peace he finds for my beseeching.
Constant he is and kind,
Love, without end.


~Emma Lou Thayne, Hymn #129 "Where Can I Turn for Peace?"

2011

It's the last day of the year. So I'm feeling a little nostalgic I guess.

So here's my year in review, in no particular order. And I'm sure I'll forget something.

While volunteering at the barn, I was given the opportunity to become the office manager and earn some extra, much-needed money. I love this job, the people, the horses, everything about it!

I became a member of the Orange County Mormon Choral Organization and was blessed with the opportunity to go to Salt Lake City and record "Messiah in America" with the East Valley Mormon Choral Organization. We also sang in the historic Tabernacle. What an amazing, once in a lifetime opportunity. Listening to the CD, I am moved to tears at different parts of the oratorio at different times. I love the whole thing!

Back in June, on the day we got back from SLC, we had an addition to our family. We got a kitten named Sage. She is such a cute little cuddly terror. She is a great comfort to both Earl and me. She gets into all sorts of trouble, jumping up on surfaces where she shouldn't be, but we love her anyway!

I started the hiring process for the Gilbert, AZ Police Department Dispatch. I have taken and passed the first test, took the second test and am now waiting to hear back on whether or not I get to move on in the process. I should hear back sometime next week, hopefully.

I spent Christmas this year battling food poisoning/stomach flu. Worked the day shift on Christmas Eve and then headed over to my folks after work. Started throwing up about 10pm and didn't stop until 4:30am. Stayed home from church on Sunday and just hung around home. Called off work for Monday (a first for my employment at Doctor's) and was finally feeling human by Tuesday night.

And now here I sit at work on New Year's Eve. It's been a good year. Difficult at times. Painful at others. But the hope and promise of 2012 keeps me going. I hope that you have a Happy New Year and may all your dreams come true!

Messiah In America

I'm feeling guilty this morning. I didn't get out of bed until 10.

It was glorious.

Last night Earl and I met up with my folks at the CD Release Celebration for OCMCO & EVMCO's joint effort last June, "Messiah in America." We recorded a 34 movement oratorio based on Christ's visit to the Americas as recorded in 3 Nephi in the Book of Mormon. I'm not a scriptorian by any means. But this oratorio was amazing. Such a testimony builder. But what was so powerful and wonderful was the joining of two choirs to produce such a massive sound. It was out of this world amazing. I started listening to the CD as soon as we got in the car to drive home. Listening to the sound that approximately 400 adults produced, it's no wonder I lost my voice last spring after our concert!

I wanted to share this with whoever reads my blog because I believe in the message of the music. It can be a great way to share the gospel with people. One of the best ways to invite the spirit is through music. And when we were recording movement #33, right as we got to the climax of the song, I got chills, goosebumps, and started to cry. After we stopped, I looked at the women all around me and they had felt the same thing. The line that got us all was, "They shall know their Redeemer." Talking about people who had never seen, never met, some had never heard of Christ, would know Him. Do we really know Him? Imagine being there, and seeing the Son of God. Would you know it was Him?

So that's my little blurb for today. If you want to purchase the CD, you may do so by going here.

And by linking up that website, I was again brought to tears by the song playing. Gosh I'm such an emotional sap!

This would totally make a great Christmas present, by the way. Just saying.

Not Quite Sure What to Title This One...

Wow, so my brain is a little fried right now. I'm not even sure why I'm writing a new post, other than for the sake of a new post!

I'm currently in Arizona. I'm here to take the 2nd test in the hiring process for the Gilbert, AZ police dispatch department. It's cool, I passed the first test and scored high enough to come back for the next step.

So as Earl and I were driving into town tonight, I got a call from some guy at PD saying that they are experiencing technical difficulties and that they need to reschedule my test. Really? Seriously? I'm not from around here, mister! I can't just reschedule at the drop of a hat!

So what did I do?

I rescheduled.

Same day, tomorrow, but 12 hours later. I was supposed to test at 0800, but now I'm scheduled at 2000. If the issues aren't resolved by then, the next available time slot is Friday at 1100. I can do that. It would mean getting into OC right at the peak of Friday night traffic, but what other option do I have?

So I'm excited that I get to sleep in tomorrow. Yay!

In other news, the CD that MCO (Mormon Choral Organization-OCMCO/EVMCO) recorded back in June is finally being released! It will be available on Tuesday, Dec. 13. Very exciting. You can go here to listen to clips from the CD. There were over 400 adults singing, 200 kids, and 100 piece orchestra. So amazing!

So I'm also having some weird shoulder issue that isn't really resolving itself. I woke up a week and a half ago with a sharp pain in my left shoulder and numbness and tingling down my arm with little to no strength.  The general sharp pain is gone, but if I don't take my anti-inflammatory, it really starts to ache pretty bad. So I'm on the anti-inflammatory as well as a muscle relaxer. I typically take the muscle relaxer at night to help me sleep. I haven't even taken it yet tonight and I'm already loopy! That's why I'm not altogether sure why I was writing a new post...

Good night!

Emotional Rollercoaster Anyone?

Wow! So last week Earl and I went to Arizona to visit with his brother and sister-in-law. It was great to see them again. While we were there, I took a test for the Gilbert, AZ police department dispatch. I'm putting feelers out for employment because let's face it, the California economy is going down!

So I took the test, hung out with family, and then hit the road back home. We left on Wednesday and came home on Friday. Super short trip, but I couldn't afford to take time off work.

I hear back yesterday that I passed the test! And I even scored high enough to move on to the next section!

So while this doesn't mean we are immediately moving, the chances are a little higher that we might move.

I'm bummed when I think about moving because I like the people here. I enjoy my work at BBTRC, and being next to both sides of the family is great. But if we move, the cost of living is significantly lower, gas is cheaper, and pretty much everything else is cheaper. So we would be able to pay off debts faster, and be more stable in the financial world.

I've also had some lows this last week. Almost had a full-blown panic attack at work on Tuesday. Not really sure what triggered it, but I overcame it. I've been beyond emotional, and the littlest things make me cry. No, I'm not pregnant. I'm just an emotional, sappy kind of girl.

So I'm not entirely sure where I'm standing today. The day started out rough, with a jackhammer at 0700. Then the cat got into the medicine cabinet and knocked one of my brand new earrings down the sink. Then as I was driving to my parent's house to get a funky long flexible magnet thingy (I know, very technical name!) I spilled my breakfast burrito down the front of my new fleece. And of course my back hurts, I think I have a pinched nerve because the pain is more of a burning all across the lowest part of my back/top of my hips. So I can't really do anything for that. Been trying to stretch as much as possible.

So that's my life in a nutshell at the moment. Here's hoping that my day goes better!

That Darn Cat

I'm trying not to be mad. Really I am. I don't like the feeling of regret. But last night was the first time that I doubted whether or not I wanted a cat.

We've had sage since June. Almost 5 months. She's been fun. She's been super cute. She's also been a holy terror.

As Earl and I were laying in bed, trying to fall asleep, Sage of course wanted to play. She went from the bed to the nightstand to the top of the dresser down to the tv stand. None of these actions are allowed. Unfortunately she doesn't respond to the squirt bottle. So we have no real way of training her what not to do.

So we chased her down from the tv stand and laid back down. Next thing I know, she went from behind the bed and tried getting up to the nightstand and/or dresser and well, let's just say she missed. She managed to pull down the clock, my old cell phone which acts as my alarm clock, my current cell phone, and my grandmother's lamp. The light bulb shattered, the lamp broke, and all of a sudden there was glass all right where I needed to stand. And of course my slippers were next to the front door since that is where I took them off yesterday afternoon.

Earl was such a trooper. I went and got him the dustpan and little Dirt Devil vacuum so he could clean it up.

During this time I put Sage in "time-out." Where is a place that a cat will stay for time-out?

The bathtub.

She doesn't like it in there. Not one bit. She probably woke the neighbors, or at least really annoyed them with her howling. But she was safe, and couldn't get into anything.

So why did I almost start crying last night? Was it because of the broken lamp that once belonged to my grandmother? Was it because that was the only item I have that connected me to her? Or was it pms starting to rear its ugly head? Probably a combination of elements.

The only good thing last night was that after all the excitement, I was able to chat with my younger brother last night. He's away at University of Utah right now. It's his freshman year. I love him dearly and miss his sweet cheesy smile. He's coming home in 2 weeks for the weekend. I hope that I'm able to see him for a little bit.

Well, I need to get dressed and eat some breakfast before today's events. It's Earl's birthday, and my parents' 39th wedding anniversary. Plus I am working with the horses this morning, as well as doing my normal stuff like get gas in the car and do laundry. Oh and I need to go pick up some things for the Open House we are having at the barn on Sunday. I have way too many things to do today and not enough time to do them all!

I keep telling myself that I love my life. I do, really, but there is too much to do today!

A Brief Testimony

I had the amazingly wonderful experience to share my testimony when I performed with the choir you hear in this video. I know the Book of Mormon to be true. I know it is the word of God. I believe it with all my heart. So watch the video!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K7-XVLs6u-c

If you are impressed and want to hear/see more, go here and buy tickets to our Christmas concert!